Volger's Birthday
by EricaHarp
Summary: It's Count Volger's Birthday aboard the Leviathan! Alek and Deryn try to plan a surprise party.


Hi guys, this is my first Fanfic ever so be nice to it! So I just had a weird idea and it turned into this:

"Deryn! Deryn!" Alek hissed as he watched the blonde midshipman walk briskly down the hallway. Deryn spun around on the spot, put one finger to her lips, and shushed him.

"Alek you dummkopf!" she hissed back. "Stop calling me that! Anyone could have heard you!"

"Sorry. But I need to ask for a favor." Alek explained.

"What? I'm on duty you know." Deryn snapped.

"It's just, well...It's Count Volger's birthday, and I wanted to do something for him. I was wondering if you could help me."

Deryn blinked once, pausing to make sure she had heard Alek right, and then burst out laughing.

"What?" Alek said, a bit offended.

"You-You want to celebrate..." Deryn wheezed between boughts of laughter. "Count Volger's birthday?!"

"What's wrong with that? He has been my only guardian since my parents died."

"Oh." Deryn said, her voice dropping. "I forgot. I'm sorry."

Alek sighed. "It's alright."

An awkward silence settled in between the two.

Deryn tried to break it first. "Umm, so what do you have in mind, your princeliness?"

"Well I suppose…Something not too grand. But it has to be a surprise." Alek mused.

Deryn thought a bit harder. "Maybe, a small ball or something? Like for Austrian royalty?"

Alek frowned. "That would be extremely hard to execute. Hosting a ball requires music, formal attire, lots of food...Basically, I don't think we can manage it."

"Alright then how did you normally celebrate birthdays?" asked Deryn.

At that, Alek frowned even harder. His two eyebrows appeared to be fighting each other.

"I don't know. I had cake and I received presents. Usually the servants would take me somewhere to have fun. My mother and father would celebrate with me for a while. Well, they stayed around for longer than they usually would. Father was always somewhere handling court affairs. I never got to spend a lot of time with them. On my eighteenth birthday, we were supposed to host a banquet. But I suppose that will never happen."

_Barking siders. _Deryn thought. _What a depressing childhood._

"How did you celebrate birthdays?" Alek asked, trying to change the subject.

"Ah, well we're a bit traditional. In Scotland when some has a birthday, you bump them."

"Bump them?"

"For each year old the person is, you give them a soft smack on the back. Or on the bum if you so prefer. And you have to do one extra for good luck."

Alek smirked, his green eyes shining.

"That's an interesting tradition." He said, obviously amused.

"There are certain disadvantages to it. Last year, my mum got so mad at me for being determined to go on with this whole 'Airman' thing, that the bumps were more like a spanking."

Alek couldn't contain himself anymore and burst out laughing. Deryn rolled her eyes.

Suddenly Alek stopped laughing.

"I have an idea!" he declared.

"What?"

"For Count Volger's birthday. We could clear the Middies Mess, and set up a few tables there. There'll be food. I can invite Klopp, Bauer and Hoffman. You can come if you'd like. Just a small celebration."

Deryn raised an eyebrow.  
"That's your grand idea?"

"I'm not done! We can set up some sort of ploy. We have to find a way to get Volger in there as a surprise."

"Ummm, how about !"

"What do you mean ?" Alek said, puzzled.

"Have you seen Volger and Dr. Barlow recently?" Deryn spluttered. "All snickering and whispering whenever they bump into each other like the sneaky-beaks they are!"

"You're serious?"

"Aye! You think they have a _thing_ for each other?"

"No! That's impossible!" Alek's face look positively disgusted, "So you're proposing to have Dr. Barlow somehow lure Volger into the Middies Mess?"

Deryn nodded, grinning.

Alek shook his head. "Mr. Sharp, you can be quite mad sometimes."

The Next Day:

Count Volger was sitting at his desk brooding over the latest stupid decision, the young foolish prince had made. Throw away the scroll? Toss away his future? All for some crazy commoner girl? The boy was insane.

Then, as Volger sat there nursing his headache, a message lizard scuttled forward. Volger looked at the creature in annoyance. What was this godless beast doing here?

The tiny lizard opened its mouth.

"Count Volger ," the creature said in authoritative female voice, "this is a message form Dr. Barlow. I should like to meet you this evening in the Middies Mess to have supper together. I hope to see you there soon. End message."

The lizard gave a pert nod of its head and crawled into one of the pipes. Volger raised his eyebrows in mild surprise. It was strange that Dr. Barlow had suddenly wanted to have supper with him, though it was probably to discuss the new situation both the Allies and Central Powers were in.

Still, it was no reason to not dress more appropriately when having dinner with a lady, Volger thought with a slight smile. He walked to the dresser and peered into its contents. It was mostly bare, except for his old Austrian military uniforms. Most of them were stained with mud, or torn and frayed at the hems. Volger dug around a bit more until he came up with a fairly clean garment. It was an older uniform, one he had worn back in the Austrian Courts. The navy blue cloth was still a bit battered, but it would do.

Count Volger inspected himself in the mirror. The fabric was somewhat tight around the chest, but he looked presentable. Volger smoothed back his hair, and tried to give himself a polite smile in the mirror. (It looked more like a forced grimace.) After he determined he was ready, he proceeded to walk confidently down toward the Middies Mess.

While Volger was getting ready, this is what was going on at the Mess:

"Barking spiders Alek, don't you even know how to set a table?" groaned Deryn.

"Not really." Alek admitted, twisting the hem of the table cloth.

Klopp, Bauer and Hoffman were still cleaning. Newkirk, and Lord knows why he showed up, was attempting to execute his grand idea of hanging big "Happy Birthday Count!" letters over the doorway. He had to stand on a chair because he was too short.

Alek and Deryn were having a heated argument over a dessert fork, Klopp couldn't locate the champagne bottle and if Newkirk leaned just an inch more forward, he was going to fall. Things were not going well.

Then Tazza burst in, immediately laying eyes on the roasted hare at the center of the table.

"NO! TAZZA!" Deryn yelled as the thylacine ran full sprint for the hare. Tazza knocked into one of the legs of Newkirk's chair, and Newkirk tumbled to the floor. The "Happy Birthday Count!" sign fell on top of him. Alek tried to stop Tazza, but only succeeded in tripping on the tablecloth. There was a frightful clatter of silverware hitting the floor.

"Look out! Tazza's off his leash!" screamed Dr. Barlow, as she sprinted into the room.

Tazza had stepped on the prongs of a dessert fork, and was barking manically in pain. The thylacine was running in crazed circles around the room. Deryn lunged for Tazza, and accidentally smashed into Hoffman. It was at this exact opportune moment, in which Count Volger decided to make his appearance.

Unfortunately, Hoffman was holding the uncorked bottle of champagne that Klopp had managed to find. As Deryn crashed into Hoffman, Hoffman tripped over Newkirk, who was laying the floor, and the champagne flew into Count Volger surprised face.

All at once the room was silent except for Tazza's whining.

"I-How-What is the meaning of this?!" Volger spluttered, his face soaked in alcohol, and as red as a tomato.

Dr. Barlow clasped her hands around her mouth, either to prevent from bursting into laughter or to hide her embarrassment. Alek's face was equally as red. Deryn, Hoffman and Newkirk detangled themselves. When no one answered, Nerkirk popped up holding his torn "Happy Birthday" sign.

"Well this is to umm…Celebrate your birthday! So, Happy Birthday Count!" he said enthusiastically.

Deryn slapped Newkirk in the head.

"Shut up, you ninny."

Volger's face turned even redder.

"This is by far, the most RIDICULOUS thing, I have ever seen! Whose idea was this?!"

Alek rose meekly. "It was my idea, Count."

Volger marched over to Alek, his mustache dripping.

"I've had enough of your foolishness, boy! First it was recklessly joining a revolution in Istanbul, then it was tossing that scroll, and now tricking me into coming to this absurd party!"

Every accusation seemed to punch Alek.

Volger was running out of breath. He stormed to the doorway, but not before spitting out one final remark,

"I hope you all clean this mess up."

Deryn looked at Alek. He seemed to be withering forlornly to floor. She felt sorry for him. It wasn't supposed to turn out this way. Deryn turned to stare at where Count Volger had walked away. It wasn't right.

Suddenly, she sprinted down the hallway and caught up with Volger.

"You can't do this Count." She protested, her voice wavering but determined.

Volger glared with annoyance at the midshipman.

"I can't do this? What about you, confusing Alek into throwing away his future for some insane commoner girl like you?"

That stung. Deryn was about to argue, but then she saw the Count's face. It was no longer furious, but strangely…sad. Even regretful. Volger slumped against the wall.

"His father did the same thing. Married Sophie and gave up an Empire. I worry for Alek, I truly do. He is still young, and sometimes makes rash decisions. I just hope-"

The Count gave a heavy sigh.

"I just hope he will make the right ones."

Deryn said nothing for a while. But then she spoke again, in a softer tone.

"I hope so too, Count. And I may never know why Alek decided to choose me over his empire, but I have faith in him. You should as well. I think that all Alek has done so far, has been right."

Volger looked up at her and she realized how old he seemed. Still, Deryn felt the need to state what she came here for.

"You still shouldn't have done that. Scroll or no scroll, Alek worked hard to plan your birthday party."

The Wildcount rose to his feet.

"You're right Mister Sharp, he did. I'm beginning to think that maybe Alek hasn't made such a rash decision choosing you after all. I suppose I should go apologize then."

And with that Volger headed back to the Middies Mess, leaving a stunned Deryn behind him.

When Deryn got back to the Mess, Alek gave her a funny look. She grinned, and grabbed the daft prince's arm. She lead Alek to the table where Volger sat, wearing the first smile she'd seen him with in days.

"Come on," Deryn said to Alek gleefully, "it's almost midnight. Let's go watch them cut the cake."


End file.
